FATBOB's biker rally reviews
Roscoe's Chili Challenge 2005 - Wild biker parties
Roscoe's Chili Challenge 2005 20th aniversary party Lakeland, FL November 4-5-6th, 2005 A biker party done right I've been hearing about Roscoe's chili challenge ever since way back when, and sortof been meaning to go check it out eventually. But it's way done in central florida and we all know how much fun it is around there. I mean it IS the same part of the country that gives us DAYTONA BIKEWEEK (yaaawwwwn), the HALLOWEEN BIKERS BALL (snoooooze) and the LEESBURG BIKEFEST (somebody shoot me please I'm bored out of my fucking mind)... Honestly, I had pretty well given up on central florida. And then I went to Roscoe's Chili Challenge ! What I actually found when I took the time to haul my ass down there was a CLASS 1 REAL HONEST TO GOD KICK BUTT BIKER PARTY! One of the best ones I've been to all year round. Honest. I was amazed. I must have mentioned about 800 times over the course of the weekend ''hey, this is a pretty damn good little party'' to whoever it was I happened to be talking to. Where do I start? First of all the actually rally grounds are pretty small. 4 or 5,000 people pretty well pack it out and it gets tough to find a camping spot if you show up at the last minute. If your so inclined you can get a hotel room in Lakeland, about a 10 minute drive away. I showed up on friday night and managed to finagle me a little corner to park my scooter & pitch up my tent. And then I went walking around to see what I could see. What I found was a lot of cool people having a good time. Free titty painting for the girls, a bunch of pretty damn decent bands and great MC who would take every & any opportunity in between contests or during band breaks to get girls to come up on the stage. Let me tell you about this MC... his name is Major Pogue aka POGO and he's been doing the chili challenge for 10 years! You know what they say, practice makes perfect, and he's damn good at it. This year he flew in from California just to be there, and for one I'm glad he could make it. He would call a girl or three up on stage and interview them. What's your name? Where are you from? Are you a redneck? Do you live in a single or double wide? Ha ha ha. Ok, enough chit chat, show the boys your tits! How cool is that? And then he'd drag out this itty bitty little trampoline and if he was extra nice, or simply really persistant he'd get them to do a special ''topless girls on trampolines'' mini show.... ya know, just for fun. And then they decided that the official wet t shirt contest the next day was simply to long to wait for, so they had a little impromptu contest on friday night. Ya know, just in case anybody was getting a little bored. Now that's my kind of party. Saturday starts off pretty early in the morning, with everybody up around 9 or 10'ish. There's this big tent they've got setup where everybody who's cooking some chili get's busy doing their thing, and some horseshoe games for everyone else. Followed by some biker games, more free titty painting and just generally farting around until early afternoon. Did I mention they started giving away free beer? The biker rodeo games are pretty cool, because unlike most biker parties I've been to most everybody on the back of a bike is ALREADY topless before the games start. As a matter of fact if you check out the rodeo pictures you will notice that they're aren't really any in the free section. That's because ALL THE BABES in the games started off nekkid so I had to put them pictures in the adults only areas. They did have something really cool I've never seen before... MINI BIKE RACING! The crowd makes a hole and they get these big fat bikers on these eeny weenie 50cc mini bike scooter thingys... and get them to race a couple of circuits. It's pretty funny to watch as every once & a while somebody loses control and goes barrelling into the crowd at about 9 mph. Only bikers could be entertained by a 300lb dude on an out of control moped. And ya, I loved it. Oooops, almost forget they also squeezed in an arm wrestling contest, a tatoo contest, a bike show, a ''who rode the furthest'' contest and of course their famous '' horse's ass '' contest. And what is a horse's ass contest? Apparently they just pull a few people out of the crowd more or less at random and get them up on stage... and people cheer for their favorites. You really don't have to do anything special, just get people to cheer for you. Hahahha... I guess that's why they call it what they do. And like any good biker rally they've got these great big trophies for everybody that won anything over the course of the weekend. Because everybody knows biger is better... and who cares how your going to get the damn thing home? That's a problem for tomorow morning, tonight let's party! Damn... I almost forget to mention their ''best painted titties'' contest. And the of course the chili cookoff winners, because when the chili's done cooking everybody can wander over & get free cups of chili. As you can tell this rally was A LOT of fun. By this time it's late saturday night, my camera's are all almost chuck full of pictures and my finger's getting cramps from pushing the button so many times... and then they have their grand finalee and big event, the Saturday night wet t shirt contest. Did I mention I had a great time? Huh? Did I? It was a great party, and a biker rally done right. I (finally) went, I saw, and it turned out to be one of the best times I've had all year. So get your permanent markers out and put ROSCOE'S CHILI CHALLENGE on your ''to do'' list next year, I promise it will be worth the trip. ---------------------- Campground Description : Grassy shaded campgrounds with huge oak trees everywhere. Porta potty toilets, showers, food & beer sold on site. Hotels, restaurants and everything else you could possibly want located less than 10 miles away in Lakeland, FL. --------------------- Entry : $40 for the entire weekend, includes primitive camping $30 on Saturday RV's extra Camping on Site : Included RV Hookups Available Free Showers on location Live Bands : Comming soon... sorry lost the list! :) Contests : Official Wet T Shirt Contest Un Official Wet T Shirt Contest Best Painted Titties Contest Girls on Trampolines Best Tatoo Contest Farthest Rider Award Horse's Ass Award Events : Biker Rodeo Games Horseshoe Toss Mini Bike Racing Chili Cookoff Free Titty Painting Food & other vendors on location Beer sold on location Hotels, bars & restaurants located less than 10 miles away in Lakeland, FL